Tag Archives: editing services

Human relations

Nephew hilarity

July 14, 2011 jkkblog Leave a comment

So, this evening I’m sitting here and the following dialogue occurs:

Nephew (from a distance, calling out over the sound of music): “Uncle, Imgnovrta Seths.”

I looked out sort of askance at him, as he is profligate with fuel. “Okay.”

Neph: “Eneedsda’ock.”

Me, incredulous: “He needs the cock?” I begin cackling.

Neph, embarrassed: “No! He needs to talk!”

By now I am belly-busting, laughing like a maniac. I can’t resist, especially as we have often kidded Neph about the time he spends with his friend. “That’s okay. We don’t have a problem with it.”

Neph, laughing a bit but ready to get the hell out of here: “And on that note, I better get going.”

He left to the sound of absolutely insane laughter from his uncle.

My nephew has a rough life at times.

Editing/writing life

Writers’ groups

July 7, 2011 jkkblog Leave a comment

Always been on the fence about these. I live in an area where interest in the written word is minimal, so there aren’t that many local writers and there are fewer capable ones. At the same time, one can possibly gain from critique. And if there aren’t that many of us, should we not at least be acquainted? Most of the time my answer is sort of ‘meh,’ but I realize that’s kind of a cop-out. So I gave one a try tonight, brand new one, formed and organized by a very quiet young mother.

The organizer feels we should pass our material around for review online first. While I can see the logic in exchanging critiqueable material offline and bringing one’s impressions to the group, it seems that if we are going to just do that, we could do this on Facebook and not bother worrying about a face-to-face meetup. It also seems like the idea is to intersperse our comments into that, print it and bring it to talk about. They are talking about a 5000-word limit, which would be about 15 pages. I could end up expected to print 40 pages of other people’s stuff. I am not sure I think that’s a good idea. I am definitely not sure I’m willing to do that at all.

I have about talked myself into at least sending some material out and going through the motions for a second session, just to see if all is redeemed by some serious insight. Or if my insight helps someone. Or something else happens to make me think this is worth doing. One participant writes exclusively screenplays, in which I have less interest than even Harlequin romances. The other two write young adult fiction, about which I know little and care rather less. I don’t feel any camaraderie there, so there isn’t that draw.

What would make a good writers’ group? In my view, intelligent critique without soul destruction is the first step. I personally have no problem having someone rip my work apart in intelligent fashion, but I keep hearing that a lot of people in writers’ groups think it’s like boot camp, where you have to break people down before they can be remolded–that brutality is a virtue. I don’t think it is, and I think that’s a viewpoint of big-fish-small-pond hotshots. I don’t like it and I don’t like them, by and large. Fortunately, there aren’t any in this group or I’d just go somewhere else.

I guess we’ll see how it goes.

Married life

Philopogon

June 27, 2011 jkkblog 4 Comments

Julian II, a.k.a. Julian Augustus, Emperor of Rome, better known as Julian the Apostate and my personal folk hero, was the last pagan Roman Emperor. He also had a beard. After enough people gave him guff for it, he wrote Misopogon (‘Beard-hater’), a diatribe against the Antiochenes. (Short version: he’d expected the hardcore Christians of Antioch to embrace him. Like most of his Empire, they didn’t. He was pissed.)

Okay, fine. Like Julian, I am bearded. What is interesting is that to the young, it registers me elder. This evening I was at a going-away party for an education executive leaving to take up a higher position. He was a Coug. For those who do not know Washington colleges, that means Washington State University, rival of the University of Washington, my much-loved alma mater. His daughter had seen the light and was attending UW. She and I exchanged old times/new times stuff for a while (and I’m glad her father wanted better things for her; speaks volumes about him).

(Seriously, my host was a fine gentleman and a very bright fellow whose guests were fun, funny and intelligent. He offered great food and drink, prominently featuring cheeses from the WSU Creamery. A salute to him and to delicious dining, and full respect to the value of land grant educational institutions that make foodieism possible. Any city slicker dumb enough to make fun of food production, while savoring gourmet this and artisan that, is effete and idiotic at once. )

The question arose as to Deb’s age, and the young lady guessed many years low. In my case, she guessed three years high. I’m not sensitive about how I look, which is a wise stance in 50ish fat, balding, salt-and-pepper old guys. When I laughed, she said: “The beard makes you look wise.” (Tell my nephew that; maybe he’ll pay attention to me.)

Interesting observation. I would like to hear from readers, especially women, since the beard is a fairly defining masculine aspect. Does a heavy, silvery beard make a man seem wise? When you see a heavy beard on a man, what does it evoke?

Adventures, Married life

Attending ye Renaissance Faire

June 25, 2011 jkkblog Leave a comment

Deb and I like to go to whatever events are happening around what one Portland sophisticate termed “the famously dull Tri-Cities.” The logic is simple. If your community doesn’t supply a vast surplus of toys for you to play with, when it does, one had best play with them, lest said community cease to supply any toys. What is more, at least in the Tri-Cities, whatever the event is, it’s not a struggle. It might be smaller than the big city version, but it’s doable and affordable and safe. There will be parking, it won’t be horribly expensive, and the crowds won’t be too big a battle. We don’t have enough people to create that large a crowd anywhere.

So we went, to ye land of ye guys fighting and ye minstrels and ye blacksmiths. I always love to watch the latter because there is a strong attraction in the combination: scent of burning coal and iron, sight of hammered metal and fiery glow, and the ring of the hammer. I like splitting obstinate pieces of wood just to swing the sledge from the end, and to hear it ring on the wedge. It’s almost as musical hearing someone else pound away.

While it’s hard to see myself deeply attracted to medievalism, there’s a lot to like about it. People make stuff. They make yarn, they make cloth, they make clothes. Candles. Daggers. Beads. Beverages. They work damn hard at this stuff, and a lot of it is pretty impressive. It suggests a self-sufficiency that resonates. What if all the electricity went out? Some people, at least, wouldn’t be utterly lost. What is more, the majority are really quite pleasant folk, ready and eager to hold forth on their fields of expertise, or help the mundanes (that would be us). It’s not like golf, where the visitor or newbie deals with impatient scowls and haughty disdain. (Do golfers not understand that this is killing their sport? I swear, the only athlete more shortsighted than a pitcher toeing the rubber is a seasoned golfer.)

It also makes me realize, from an editing perspective, how much esoteric vocabulary got left behind in the Middle Ages. Just all the parts of a suit of armor, or of a castle, or terms for long-faded occupations and tools have caused thousands of words to slip into disuse. A medieval fair is heaven for places who know or want to learn all those.

When I go to these events with Deb, I don’t really take in most of the event because her sort of random wandering style and my systematic canvassing don’t really harmonize that well. I usually yield to hers unless the event is something in which I have deep and specific interest, with the result that I don’t really see or take in most of what is going on, and that’s fine. It’s more about just being out and about as a couple, doing what there is locally to do and enjoy.

Plus, there was a male belly dancer. He was actually pretty good, rocking it. I respected him. And as Deb pointed out to me (as if to a slow child), he was flirting with me. Ha! I always attract the bear lovers.

Just call me Yogi.

Adventures

It’s only a fish wound!

June 17, 2011 jkkblog Leave a comment

Well, not a bad one. How do you get cut open by a fish on land? Well, suppose you are bumbling through your local antique store, and they have just set down a big swordfish (heavy sucker, like 5′ long). Not being real bright people, they put the fish diagonally, so that the tail fins stuck right out into a walkway. Unfortunately, they didn’t contrast much visually with the linoleum. Thunk. While I’m not the type to run around blaming other people or institutions for my poor navigation, it probably wasn’t their smartest move to put that there, either. I mean, you wouldn’t put a pitchfork down there with the tines sticking out into the walkway.

I was surprised how sharp the fish tail’s tip was; went right through my skin along the top of the kneecap. The woman operating the place showed zero concern, even when I said “I guess there isn’t much blood.” That told me she wasn’t the sharpest business tool in the shed. She did offer me some coffee. Did I retort: “Why, is coffee good to put on a bleeding gash?” No, I did not.

The post’s title, of course, was that quick comeback that we think of later, the one we never think of at the time. At least I don’t.

One reason I like editing is because I always have time to think of what to suggest someone should say.

Technology

software updates

June 13, 2011 jkkblog Leave a comment

Have you noticed, folks, that when you just automatically go ahead and update a piece of software to a newer version:

They moved everything around, apparently for no logical reason other than it looked cuter?
They added maybe one thing you cared about, and twenty you didn’t care about?
The things you liked most about it before, now no longer work the same?
It’s slower and clunkier?

The problem is endemic to software and has been with us for a long time. I think it must have its roots in the way software designers think, because it is very consistent. Most ‘upgrades’ are in fact downgrades. And these days, it seems, that most of them lean toward letting more and more companies poke around on your machine, with nothing preventing them from phoning home with information that is none of their business.

It gets worse if you depend on software to enable you to work. What if it introduces complications in the middle of a huge editing project? “Dear Ms. Client. Sorry I am going to be late. I upgraded my software and now my life sucks.” Yeah, they’re real understanding about that.

There are a few updates that nearly always make sense, namely those to do with security. If your Windows wants to download a security update, you should. If your virus scanner wants to update itself, by all means. If you use a spyware/malware package, definitely keep it current. But anything else? Faaaaaa. Just don’t update it until they force you at bayonet point, or give you some compelling reason in terms of features.

Ignore the constant pleas and pressure. You’ll be happier.

Adventures, Married life

Whitewater rafting

June 8, 2011 jkkblog Leave a comment

I haven’t done this in so long, but a WWR trip is one of my presents to my bride for her 50th birthday (at which time, in April, it was a little cold for that most places). We’re going to take along a couple of dear friends.

Currently we’re deciding between the Methow (north central WA), the Deschutes (central OR) and someplace else. If anyone has any recommendations within 4-5 hours of Tri-Cities, WA, by all means please advise.

The Editorial Maverick